Steading of the Hill Giant Chief Scale Model

Just in case you haven't seen this yet, it has to be seen!
Scale model of the Steading of the Hill Giant Chief
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Penis Jokes and Quenya Elvish

The Game-Theoreticians of Candlekeep have identified two different approaches to gaming. The first approach would be a sort of emulation of J.R.R. Tolkien, a heroic or anti-heroic saga created by the players as their characters fight and spellcast their way to fame and fortune.

The second approach to gaming almost certainly has penis jokes from time to time, or at the very least a healthy dose of Monty Python and the like. I don't mean that it's written into the adventure; even the bawdiest of DMs, if they're experienced as a DM, knows that the players will create plenty of humor on their own if left unchecked. For the DM to write it into the adventure is probably going to fail. I don't know why, but it just seems too heavy handed. On the other hand, if the thief suddenly says, "*snurk* this ten foot pole is longer than the wizard's staff, so I better do the probing," that's stone-cold brilliant. Cue for everyone to fall down laughing.

Some DMs try to restrict this sort of thing, attempting to get the players to stay "in character," or stay "focused," or even "serious." I can understand that kind of play. Really, I can. I saw someone post the other day a triumphant announcement that his character had done this-and-such, slaying that-and-such, and being awarded the barony of where-and-such. The pride was glowing, and you could tell that this adventure session would be talked of forever, possibly a high point of the guy's life.

(let me tell you about how when I was 12, my character became the King of Celene in Greyhawk, if I can ever corner you at a convention some time.)

So, that sort of epic in-character gaming can be rewarding beyond belief, I totally get that. But then ... there is penis-joke gaming. And penis-joke gaming is always awesome, because it's a game. It doesn't forget that it's a game. And, you know, even if you name your stronghold something like "Bigspire of [Character Name]," the World of Greyhawk can absorb that kind of humor. Heck, the place was built on puns and anagrams in the first place.

So, even if it's not ACTUALLY penises that arise from the group's humor, having a good mix of at least potential humor -- without being "serious about the fantasy" -- makes for more fun in the long run, in my opinion. And even if the DM is making everyone speak in Tolkien's Quenya dialect of Elven ... the DM will probably discover that you can make penis jokes in Quenya, too.

Welcome to Candlekeep. *Snurk*

Manic Monday - Writing Again

All of a sudden last Tuesday or so, I suddenly started being able to write well again, after yet another long dry spell of looking at blank pages, keyboard to hand, empty of prose. It's always hard to tell when that's just a creative dry spell or a depression-without-mood-downswing. Similarly, starting Tuesday, it's hard to tell if it's hypomania or if it's just a sudden influx of creativity.

The suddenness of the demarcation makes me thinks it's bipolar-related. Not that I care, frankly. As long as I'm functional, I'm back, baby!

Highlights of the day all have to do with Cyclopean Deeps. The dimensional realm of the archmage Jupiter Kwan has made progress by leaps and bounds. I inked the draft map today and sent it to Skeeter (the project manager of the gods), who will assemble the maps and get them to Robert Altbauer (our awesome cartographer). Everything that I'm doing is suddenly the filling in of gaps rather than building new places.

Image (you'll see why, in the chapter I'm writing) Hound of Tindalos by Manzanedo

Archaological News

(Edward Whitson waits while yet another tortured wraith rises from a dig site in Syria.)

For those considering a career in archaeology, this article might give you pause to think. "Turning to the subject of his latest incident at a dig site in Peru, Whitson maintains he was not at fault for summoning the forces of evil."

A couple of other bits of archaeological material: The discovery of the race of skeleton-people, and one that appears to be real: bunny archaeologists.

Here, incidentally, are the stats for Whitson's Ocelot, the creatures discovered by Dr. Whitson in Peru:
Whitson's Ocelot: HD 2; AC 6[13]; Atk 1 bite (1d6) or breathe; Move 18; Save 16; AL N; CL/XP 3/60; Special: breathe lightning bolt (60ft) for 1d6 damage, save to avoid.

OSR Superstar Contest

Tenkar's Tavern has announced a pretty cool contest -- old school creativity. Different rounds involve creating a monster, creating an adventure to go with it, and other things galore. It will create a LOT of good ideas, partly because the prizes are phenomenal. First prize is an actual $250 in cash plus one of the new OD&D sets.

Frog God Games is going to kick in some coupons, because right at the moment there aren't many runner-up prizes. I think these competitions get a lot more attention if people know that they don't necessarily have to win first place to be recognized and to win a prize. I can't get too aggressive with this, since Bill Webb is on his way to Hawaii right now, but I know that I can offer:
1 20% discount coupon
5 that are 10% off, and
10 that are 5% off

I might be able to increase the amounts of those discounts, or the total number of coupons, but first I have to get into contact with Bill.

Rock of Stability

Okay, here's a magic item that I think isn't too powerful. It's very useful in the context of the adventure I'm writing, so I want to give away a couple of them. Is there some use of this item that would make it super-powerful -- in other words, am I missing something obvious?


Here's the item:

A rock of stability, unsurprisingly, appears to be a normal rock. The rock’s possessor cannot be affected by turbulence, although a steady force of air or water, such as a gust of wind, will still exert one half of its normal effect in that direction. Taking river rapids as an example: the character will be moved down the river at half the normal speed and with half the normal force that the river’s flow exerts. However, the character will not be thrown from side to side in the rapids at all. If the river rapids are moving at a rate of 7mph, the character will be forced along at a rate of only 3.5mph, and will thus likely be able to avoid rocks much more easily than a character subjected to the full 7mph force of the river. Only the movement of gases and liquids is affected by the rock; a moving wall of stone or a falling anvil would push or strike the character as per normal.

(This isn't intended as a test of your ingenuity as a player, although feel free to show it off if you want.  It's really about whether there's a fairly obvious use of it that I haven't noticed).

Ningauble of the Seven Eyes

My favorite "wizards" are the two patrons of Fafyrd and the Grey Mouser, the ineffably cool Sheelba of the Eyeless Face and Ningauble of the Seven Eyes. That's sort of where I'm going with Jupiter Kwan in the Cyclopean Deeps, although so far he's more about what he does than what he is.

Cyclopean Deeps is almost certainly going to represent a financial loss for Frog God Games, and has cost me a disastrous amount of time that should really have been spent on the Swords & Wizardry game -- promotion of the game, publication of smaller stuff, keeping in better contact with people on the net, and this blog. In light of that ...

it had better be a masterpiece.

Working diligently on that. In the meantime, remember: dealing with archmages always has a cost, even if it isn't immediately apparent.